Day 5

Kyle 284.4 day -1.4 total -10.2

Jenny 163.4 day -0.6 total -3.2

According to our bathroom scale, the eggs did not stall me. Maybe I could have lost 2 pounds without them? I don't know. But I'll take 1.4 all day long!

I know that I'm only on day 5, but on every day of this protocol, I have been amazed by my enhanced moods, increased energy and improved attitudes. For the majority of the day, I am better. I am happy. I am excited. Which is part of what also amazes me, what seems to be two polar opposite positions in this experience. Now, I do not want to be misunderstood. The highs that constitute one position are not "highs" in the typical sense of the word. I would have to call them "evens." They are smooth, healthy, enjoyable, but not over the top or over-stimulating. My layman hypothesis is that this is the positive effect of not filling my body with additives, preservatives, trans fats, hydrogenated oils, and a myriad of man-made products that are not good for me.

And it is these "ingredients" that I suspect are the culprits for the other polar position in this experience. Like a junkie suffering through withdrawal or jonesing for his next fix, there are certain times, almost always in the evenings, when I become depressed, agitated and fixated on certain foods and food products. But the truth is that I am not depressed, agitated or fixated because I cannot have these foods, but because I am withdrawing from and jonesing for the experience of eating the food. My brain, or some chemical center in my brain, is telling me that I need these foods, I need the enjoyment of the taste, the experience, and ultimately, the effects of the chemicals in the product.

As I do my best to separate myself from the experience, even as I am in it, and to look at what I am going through from an objective or even scientific view, I find myself staring wide-eyed at simple and plain truth that should have been so easy to see before this. Yet even this success, this accomplishment and triumph of truth is tainted with the thoughts of, "I can't wait until this is over so I can eat this and have that and enjoy this and eat that," and so on.

Since I am experiencing NO physical feelings of hunger or fatigue, headaches or loss of strength, or anything of the sort, I must accept that this is a concrete and purely psychological challenge. Which means it all comes down to self-discipline and self-restraint. Do I have the maturity to postpone my own gratification in order to reach a goal that I supposedly so greatly desire (or at least desire more than the simple taste of something)? Do I have the maturity to recognize that what I desire for gratification is not healthy, not good for me, and probably shouldn't even be a source of gratification, now and in the future?

How much better could my life be if I looked for gratification and satisfaction in things of substance!